Smiles

I laughed so much today that i literally had tears in my eyes.. I seriously am gonna miss the people with whom i commute daily to my office.. They are just so much fun :)

And I have one more reason to be happy.. I talked with an 8 yr old girl today.. She is studying in 1st class, and i am sponsoring her education.. It is just so satisfying to do a good deed.. She was so nervous that she spoke in whispers in the beginning.. :) And she called me aunty :( :( I remembered "Aunty mat kaho" from an old serial "Hum Panch".. lol.. And she pronounced my name as some Dolly chhavera.. :( anyways i told her my sirnme is sapra and pls call me didi instead.. :D pata nahi agli baar kya bulayegi ab wo..
And i later learned from the office spokeswoman that she was talking on phone for the first time.. And was very excited to talk.. :) I might call her a bit more often just to make her happy :)

Sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand..

My life is about to change..

Well, My life is headed for a major change.. Things that mattered once are not important anymore.. Probably I will change too and for good.. I wish i'll be happy and satisfied with life.. And i wish everything turns out to be nice :)

Breaking the habit

Memories concern
Like opening the wound
Im picking me apart again
You all assumeIm safer in my room
Unless I try to start again
I dont want to be the one
Who battles always choose
Cuz inside I realize
That Im the one confused

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I dont know why I instigate
And say what I dont mean
I dont know how I got this way
I know its not alright
So Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit tonight

Cultured my cureI tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I have no options left again
I dont want to be the one
Who battles always choose
Cuz inside I realize
That Im the one confused

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I dont know why I instigate
And say what I dont mean
I dont know how I got this way
Ill never be alright
So, Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit tonight

Ill paint it on the walls
Cuz Im the one that falls
Ill never fight again
And this is how it ends

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I dont know how I got this way
Ill never be alright
So, Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit
Breaking the habit tonight

---Linkin Park

"SOME" men are such A**holes

I can not really tell you how dissapointed i am in some men i came across at my workplace..
One person, very experienced, a project manager, cannot take it that a woman is working under him and is one of the best.. Her appraisals are going to be bad and she says, appraisals with him are confidence breaking sessions, not at all what they should be.. Another one favours women and no lady's appraisal is ever bad.. I dont know why this gender difference should come in the way of work.. And worse happens when no one sees it as it could be changed.. People agree it is a problem but nothing can be done against those who wish to differentiate their workforce, based upon gender..
Another man, married and a post graduate i.e. highly educated, sees her wife to be inferior to him. He doesnot wanto allow her to do a job.. He doesnot even consider she might have a wish.. Though it is between him and his wife and i hve no right to say against their mutual understanding, i could help but notice the way with which he speaks as if he owns her life and she should do as he says.. He proudly claims that he doesnot let her watch her TV after 10 even when she wants to watch some saas-bahu serial.. He has the supreme power in his household and this is infact a great achievement for him.. Disgusting beyond words..
And one more person i am pissed off with is someone i commute daily with. He apparantly loves to tease people and belittle them.. And thinks he is the apple of eyes in every one's eyes because of his humorous ways.. sigh..
Lastly, i met a guy some time back for matrimonial purposes.. He was the real a**hole.. He wants wife, someone who cooks for him throughout his life, who should be ready to leave her job when he thinks he is earning enough. When i obviously didnt meet his "requirements", He said NO (( thankfully )) along with a whole lot of derogatory words for me.. He projected me as a loose character in front of my parents.. It was a BOMB which rocked my home for a long while and still does in some way or the other..

But for good, i know many wonderful men in my life.. and am glad for having them :)

Life, as it turns out to be..

How difficult it is to let go of things, which are very dear to you, and yet you know are harming you in some way or the other..

How difficult it is to believe that image you have in your mind is not what reality is..

How dificult it is to make someone, you love, believe in what you are doing; when they clearly dont agree to what you want to do..

How difficult it is to be standing in front of brutal truth, when all this while you assumed nonchalantly about the beauty of everything nice going in your life..

I know it is very difficult.. do you?

Birthday Wishes.. :)

Well, me bday is just round the corner, and i was just wondering what to write in new post for mah blog.. So I am telling you all what i wish to get on my budday :)

1. A wall clock.. My last wall clock just vanished after my room got a makeover. I find it so dissapointed to look at my empty wall, when i wake up in the morning. With eyes half open and my brain half asleep, I just forget there's no clock for now. That is my first and the most impotan wish for this birthday.. I have ventured out 3 times to look for a very nice clock.. but i still have not found the right kind. :(

2. A digital thermometer.. Just Like that..

3. some beautiful pin-up posters with a nice thought thrown in for that added attraction.. i want them to stick them on my cubicle-walls in office.. I'll probably make two or three.. :) And i am also going to make a penstand.. i have an idea in mah mind and i might make it over this weekend..

4. Peace at home.. there's a cold war going on between me and mah parents.. i would like to end that even when i know its a far-fetched wish..

5. Flowers.. Somehow people always tend to give roses on bdays.. And i always wished someone would give me something different this time.. like some wild flowers.. i love small flowers, the tiny ones bunched up together :)

6. Some new clothes, some new sandals, some new earrings and some new lipsticks.. i will be going to a shopping trip next weekend, after i get my first stipend.. :)

7. eye lenses.. I am tired of wearing specs( even though i dun wear them often enuff :D).. any suggestions on what type/kind/color/brand to choose from?

8. A book whose name i have forgotten right now :D i'll check it up and then buy it.. A pulp-fiction novel wont be too bad either..

Somethings i'll buy for my self.. somethings i'll make for myself.. somethings i'll hope to get as presents.. and somethings i know i am not going to get..

So thats about it for now.. i might add/delete somethings to this, since i still have 2 weeks to change my mind over something.. and if you want to gift me something you are always always welcome :D