Friends, Laughter, Fights etc.

I would not have been the same person without the friends i have had, as i passed through various phases of my life.
All moments, smiles, fights, sharing tiffin boxes, pulling legs, gossips, laughter, embarrassments, scoldings, back-bitings, saving money for someone's birthday, Bunking classes, Going to movies and hooting there, having innumerous crushes and then having looooong discussions over him..
Everything seem so distant now, yet remain close to heart..

The Red Carpet

I was recently traveling by air to home for Diwali.. It was a lovely evening with some clouds on the sky.. But i never imagined this lovely evening was going to get transformed into a breathtakingly beautiful evening..
I got a window seat from where i could directly watch the sun. I was glad for the clouds which stood as guards against the glaring sun-shine and providing excellent view at the same time.. I could not click a snap, but the adjacent photo is pretty much similar to what i saw that day..
Our plane went over the smaller cloud and gave us a spectacular view of changing colors on the bigger cloud.. Watching the sun's play on this cloud was just spell-bounding.. from grey to illuminated borders to sizzling golden to absolute white..
I was about to close my windshield since the sun was directly shining on my eyes.. But i guess it was a lucky day.. I noticed a red Carpet below the plane. A soft furry red carpet. At first i din realized what is it. The plane's wing tilted a bit & i saw the sun, just about to set, at extreme corner of the earth. Dimmed by clouds surrounding it, emanating a dull yellow sparkle .. The color slowly turned into Red as it moved away from the golden ball hung at the horizon.. The clouds directly below us were reflecting the afterglow and were giving the illusion of velvety soft red carpet..
The pic i have shown here is a bit different. What i witnessed was a little more yellow near the sun, a little smoother cloud-surface and a brighter shade of red on the clouds.. but this was the only pic i found on google which had sunset above clouds :D (I wish clicking snaps was allowed while flight takes off, It would have been soooo gud)

Compliments

I got few after a team building workshop -

* I speak my mind quite easily & quickly
* My smile is contagious
* I trust my team members well
* I am very creative
* I have an eye for detail
* I have good communication skills
* I am very articulate, i choose my words well
* I am honest and always consistent in what i say

Thanks for all these words! It feels good to be appreciated once in a while :)

SandCastle - A Story

"Mom!!! you are not listening to me!! Loooooook aaatt myyyy saaaand caaaastle."

I suddenly came back from my siesta. Krish, my 4 year old son was calling me for something. Oh! He wants me to look at his sandcastle, which i know would be exactly the same as he made yesterday and the day before yesterday and the day before that. I smiled slowly. He is such a kid! well, 4-year olds are actually called kids. Phew!! From where do they get all the energy from, is still not very apparent to me.

"Mom!!! Come-on, you are soooo laaaaazy. I have taken 2 rounds from my castle towards you and you are still sitting here". My little son was shouting at me and i was watching him speechlessly. I hugged him while he was making those cute little faces while speaking. "Okay, so now will you come? Please! Please! Please!" He said softly in my ear. He probably has learned how to coax me into doing something for him. Somehow he was getting too eager to show me his castle, which i have been watching since the time he learned how to make it.

I took his hand on my palm and started walking with him to his sandcastle. And the instant I lay my eyes on it I knew the reason for his eagerness. He had decorated the sandcastle with shells and hey, there's a starfish too. I saw him with a swelled-up chest, looking at me, waiting for me to say its good.
"Its good, Lets go home now. You deserve a chocolate for all your hard work". I guess chocolate trick might do the works, for i know, from my experience of course, that he doesn't leave the beach quickly.

He kept rattling on. His chats (short)ranging from different colors of shells he collected to how he caught the star fish. I tried remembering what shells did i collect when i was his age.

In this small brain of mine, 28 years of a life are huddled up. Rewinding back by 24 years is not easy. I don't think i remember anything from that time of my life. But i do remember the time i told my parents that i am going to get married to sandeep. Their thought process didn't include letting their daughter get married at her own will. On top of that he was not from our caste. I never could understand what difference does a caste make?

Even though my parents agreed to get us married, they never believed i could be happy in this marriage. They warned me that this marriage is like a sandcastle, it'll wash away with next wave of fights. 5 years have went past since, but my parents attitude is still the same. Today, mom called me up, only to confirm that i am happy. Its so ironic that she wants me to be happy but cannot see the way my heart melts whenever i see sandeep walking towards me. she cannot see how beautiful my life is with two men to pamper me around. Hmm well, that is, if you could call Krish a man too.

And well, If i inspect closely, I see my son making sandcastles everyday, I hear him talk about it every hour. When I watch my husband helping him out on Sundays, I know my marriage finally has become a BIG sandcastle as my parents expected. BUT, It doesn't get washed away, it just get growing in our hearts. I am happy.

GO GOA!!!

Some momeries from my recent trip to goa..

- Hunting for Red garments
- Playing guitar nd congo in the train, when i dont really know how to play them :)
- Feeling dead cold while sleeping, i din have anything to keep myself warm :(
- Enjoying the personal suite and hot water shower(which i miss at my home :( )
- Going inside the sea for the very first time. jumping with the incoming waves.. going a lil deeper in the sea with frens.. tasting the sea water.. I din like the taste of salt in the sea :D
- Collecting shells on the beach..
- Making sand-castle and then decorating it with shells & a StarFish..
- Playing polo in pool & trying to remember how to swim..
- Feeling nervous that my dance will go wrong on stage.. it was just not practised enough
- Sitting on beach till late into the night
- Not giving way to the shuttle driver to go past us while coming back from the beach
- Drinking 7up for Rs.115/- and then talking non-stop till i went to sleep
- Getting difficulty in getting up in the morning
- Parsing the Goan roads on bike & gettting lost innumerous times in the night
- Buying some (more) junk jewellery from beach side stalls & getting tempted to buy 12 earrings for just 80 bucks.
- Parasailing, looking at 360 degree horizon and loving every minute of flying in the air.
- Taking out crabs( or whatever they were) from their shells, watching star fish moving its tentacles when taken out of water
- Watching sunset over sea and discussing an abandoned ship on shores of aguada fort
- Singing songs while coming back to our hotel, watching Ishwar jump from scooty everytime it hit a speedbreaker
- Dancing non-stop on DJ night and having 4 scoops of icecream later
- Having a memorable night of my life
- Hurryingly packing-up to wait for "gift a friend" but finally exchanging my gift :D
- Clicking snaps with "vasco" in different poses

Iske baad ki memories not too gud, so not trying to remember them.. :D

And remembering a few gud ones i cant write here.. all of these made GOA a wonderfull trip..

I feel so complete

I realise what all i was missing living away from home.. living away from my parents & living away from my love.. Doing nothing at home has its own charm, even though i dont like to sit idle for a long time..

Life is so sweet when shared with people you love most in your life :)

I am tired

Splash!!!

Just A Quick Recap

When

The school reopened in June,
And we settled in our new desks and
benches!

When we queued up in book depot,
And got our new books
and notes!

When we wanted two Sundays and no Mondays, yet
managed to line up daily for the morning prayers.
We learnt writing with
slates and pencils, and
Progressed To fountain pens and ball pens and then Micro tips!

When we began drawing with crayons and evolved to
Color pencils and finally sketch pens!

When we started calculating
first with tables and then with
Clarke's tables and advanced to
Calculators and computers!

When we chased one another in the
corridors in Intervals, and returned to the classrooms
Drenched in sweat!

When we had lunch in classrooms, corridors,
Playgrounds,
under the trees and even in cycle sheds!

When all the colors in the world,
Decorated the campus on the Second Saturdays!

When a single P.T. period in the week's Time Table,
Was awaited more eagerly than the monsoons!

When cricket was played with writing pads as bats,
And Neckties and socks rolled into balls!

When few played
"kabadi" and "Kho-Kho" in scorching sun,
While others simply played
"book cricket" in the
Confines of classroom!
Of fights but no conspiracies,
Of Competitions but seldom jealousy!

When we used to
watch Live Cricket telecast,
In the opposite house in Intervals and Lunch breaks!

When few rushed at 3:45 to
"Conquer" window seats in our School bus!
While few others had "Big Fun", "peppermint",
"Kulfi", "milk ice!" and "sharbat!" at 4o Clock!

Gone are the days
Of Sports Day,
and the annual School Day,
And the one-month long
preparations for them.

Gone are the days
Of the stressful Quarterly,
Half Yearly and Annual Exams, and the most
enjoyed holidays after them!

Gone are the days
of tenth and twelfth standards, when
spent almost the whole year writing revision tests!

We learnt,

We enjoyed,

We played,

We won,

We lost,

We laughed,

We cried,

We fought,

We thought.

With so much fun in them, so many friends,

So much experience, all this and more!

Ring ceremony

My goodness!! Ring ceremony is such a hotch potch affair.. cartoon se tayyar ho jao, khoob saara makeup laga ke.. then walk dead slow from gate to the altar.. walk FAST and people around pull u back.. If u still dont walk slow, there's the damn photographer.. He'll keep on muttering, "Walk slow", "Look to the right", "look a little down".. eeewks!! And not to mention everyone looking at you.. Even the known ones look at me like they are seeing me for the first time in their life..
And when i reached the altar, I thought all i'll have to do is sit comfortably and smile.. But people were so eager to come on stage give their blessings and leave jaldi se.. total dum ghontu experience..
Dance was good.. We did salsa together :) I enjoyed a lot while dancing, which i always do, but that photographer was pissed off cos my make-up would get spoiled. But anyways he couldnt stop me :) Best part was the number of compliments we got later for pretty good dancing..
Then there was photosession.. We posed in all those poses, our parents stood in their wedding.. I laughed so much.. generally photographer has to say that please smile a little, our photographer said please laugh a little less.. :)
Then we had dinner and the eve got over.. I pretty much liked it :)

Is it ME you are talking about?

Everyone sees what they want to see.. I am being seen as a daughter, a sister, a would-be wife, a woman.
I have no problems being seen in different roles, but why does it happens sometimes that people forget that i am an individual first and that i might have my own say in issues relating closely to myself?

7-things tag..

1. 7 Things i want to do in lifetime : -


* Bungee jumping.
* Write a novel of my own.
* Gift life to an orphan girl, provide her education and a good living.
* Do a mind blowing dance performance on stage, something not easily forgotten.
* Visit all countries (atleast a lot of them), to travel, to photograph, to enjoy, to learn.
* Place "Dr." Before my name
* Open a sunday school, for children to have fun, to learn what is absent in schools and leave their TVs and PCs for a while.



2. 7 Things i can do : -


* Listen to music 24X7
* Speak up against unfair treatment
* Kiss in a public place
* Talk non-stop for hours
* Smile at a stranger and get a smile in return.
* Go on doing things i wanto do, even if people criticise or dissaprove
* Appreciate beautiful things, man made as well as nature's :)

3. 7 Things i can't do : -


* Believe in a supreme power controlling our lives.
* Love unconditionally
* Talking to a hypocrite person
* Remember everyone's bdays and anniversaries
* Do something just to please someone or for money alone
* Hang in the air while holding onto something overhead, My grip is too bad..
* Harm someone for my own interests



4. 7 Things that attract me to other person : -


* Smile
* Expressive eyes
* Intelligence
* Laid back ease in attitude
* Broad-minded thinking
* Display of affection
* Dancing skills



5. 7 My secrets : -

* I can prepare good meals, even though i literally hate cooking
* Its difficult for me to see good points of anything/anyone "before" I notice the negative ones, i guess, that way i appreciate positive things better.
* Forgive everyone very soon, I myself cannot remain hurt for long
* I think a lot, sometimes making a small problem into a big one, just because i imagine its going to be bad
* I painting skills have ecome pathetic.. Its been a long time since i painted something with watercolors. I have almost forgotten how to merge colors on canvas, maybe it'll comeback when i start painting regularly
* I like playing flash
* I catch cold if i remain in airconditioned room for long..



6. 7 People i care : -


* Papa
* Mumma
* My brothers
* Sush
* Abhi
* My best fren from school
* Pri


7. 7 People i want to take up this tag : -

anyone who feels like doing this is welcome :)

language blooper

"The qualitie's' of this dress in pink's' and its embroiderie's' is very good's'. Its fitting's' is good's' too."
~ from a salesman at a dress shop.

lol !!

The Difference between Focusing on Problems and Focusing on Solutions

Case 1
When NASA began the launch of astronauts into space, they found out that the pens wouldn't work at zero gravity (ink won't flow down to the writing surface).

To solve this problem, it took them one decade and $12 million. They developed a pen that worked at zero gravity, upside down,underwater, in practically any surface including crystal and in a temperature range from below freezing to over 300 degrees C.

And what did the Russians do...?? They used a pencil.


Case 2
One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soap wrapper that was empty.

Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department.For some reason, one soap box went through the assembly line empty. Management asked its engineers to solve the problem.

Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty. No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent a whoopee amount to do so.

But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the same problem, he did not get into complications of X-rays, etc., but instead came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched the fan on, and as each soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.

:)

Away..

Sometimes I just want to pick up my shoes and run.. Run away from this maddening crowd.. Run away from responsibilities.. Run away from expectations.. And just be me..

Associative memory

A chinese person's view : All Indian faces look almost the same..

Isnt it facinating how our brain works.. I remember reading an article about associative memory, which is so beautifully illustrated by this similar faces perception.. Our brain associates new patterns with what it has in store. New faces, new patterns.. When he looks at us, he asociates all of us with an Indian face.. It takes time to register finer patterns of a new race in memory..
And whats more fascinating is the fact our brain doesnot easily get confused with different people, even when we might meet so many new people frequently. This is beacause of this associative memory we have got. And probably not many people know why we have this kind of memory.. This is because of the massive parallel neural network we have inside our head.. The best computer ever made.. When we do memory improving problems, we are making our neurons learn how to associate quickly and to work together in a better possible way.. not a single parallel computer is more efficient than a mere 1% of our brain.. These neurons work together in parallel to compare new patterns and old ones, and provide us back with an instant recognition of a pattern.


Nature always does everything in best possible way.. Nothing beats it!!

Yo Salsa!!

Salsa is really so much fun :) I was surprised at my partner's dedication to learn this dance.. I usually take small breaks in between, but he could go on without a break even though he is learning this dace for the first time..

It is a rule in salsa that the male partner leads the dance, but its really so tempting to tell him to do this step next.. I have to literally control myself not to lead him :)

Update : After i saw this post on mah blog, i just loved the pic and this shade of red over black background..

Money matters..

Its good to have money & the things it can buy. But its also god to check once in a while & make sure you haven't lost the things money can't buy..

my first date after officially getting engaged

walking hand in hand
fights over seatbelts
car-insurance lost
drinking breezer and feeling light headed
adding more to my earring collection
carrying his wallet, with permission to use it as much i want
reading sms
no-smoking zone
the namesake
resting my head on his shoulders throughout the movie
snatching away my hand when lights went on
popcorn
not being able to walk a bit more
listening to his heartbeats
gifting some beautiful handmade things
giving away the first love-letter
caught by traffic police
An unplanned really-long drive
feeling his head's weight on me
falling my head on him the moment we entered the car
delicious pasta at ruby tuesday
fitting my hand in his to find way in dark movie-hall
sleeping when the movie went totally boring
watching miss mazumdar dancing and blushing
saying love u and lotsa kisses on cheeks
pulling his cheeks and making him smile
knowing the right way to remove alcohol's odour
pushing back the car-seat upto max

Smiles

I laughed so much today that i literally had tears in my eyes.. I seriously am gonna miss the people with whom i commute daily to my office.. They are just so much fun :)

And I have one more reason to be happy.. I talked with an 8 yr old girl today.. She is studying in 1st class, and i am sponsoring her education.. It is just so satisfying to do a good deed.. She was so nervous that she spoke in whispers in the beginning.. :) And she called me aunty :( :( I remembered "Aunty mat kaho" from an old serial "Hum Panch".. lol.. And she pronounced my name as some Dolly chhavera.. :( anyways i told her my sirnme is sapra and pls call me didi instead.. :D pata nahi agli baar kya bulayegi ab wo..
And i later learned from the office spokeswoman that she was talking on phone for the first time.. And was very excited to talk.. :) I might call her a bit more often just to make her happy :)

Sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand..

My life is about to change..

Well, My life is headed for a major change.. Things that mattered once are not important anymore.. Probably I will change too and for good.. I wish i'll be happy and satisfied with life.. And i wish everything turns out to be nice :)

Breaking the habit

Memories concern
Like opening the wound
Im picking me apart again
You all assumeIm safer in my room
Unless I try to start again
I dont want to be the one
Who battles always choose
Cuz inside I realize
That Im the one confused

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I dont know why I instigate
And say what I dont mean
I dont know how I got this way
I know its not alright
So Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit tonight

Cultured my cureI tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I have no options left again
I dont want to be the one
Who battles always choose
Cuz inside I realize
That Im the one confused

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I dont know why I instigate
And say what I dont mean
I dont know how I got this way
Ill never be alright
So, Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit tonight

Ill paint it on the walls
Cuz Im the one that falls
Ill never fight again
And this is how it ends

I dont know whats worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I dont know how I got this way
Ill never be alright
So, Im breaking the habit
Im breaking the habit
Breaking the habit tonight

---Linkin Park

"SOME" men are such A**holes

I can not really tell you how dissapointed i am in some men i came across at my workplace..
One person, very experienced, a project manager, cannot take it that a woman is working under him and is one of the best.. Her appraisals are going to be bad and she says, appraisals with him are confidence breaking sessions, not at all what they should be.. Another one favours women and no lady's appraisal is ever bad.. I dont know why this gender difference should come in the way of work.. And worse happens when no one sees it as it could be changed.. People agree it is a problem but nothing can be done against those who wish to differentiate their workforce, based upon gender..
Another man, married and a post graduate i.e. highly educated, sees her wife to be inferior to him. He doesnot wanto allow her to do a job.. He doesnot even consider she might have a wish.. Though it is between him and his wife and i hve no right to say against their mutual understanding, i could help but notice the way with which he speaks as if he owns her life and she should do as he says.. He proudly claims that he doesnot let her watch her TV after 10 even when she wants to watch some saas-bahu serial.. He has the supreme power in his household and this is infact a great achievement for him.. Disgusting beyond words..
And one more person i am pissed off with is someone i commute daily with. He apparantly loves to tease people and belittle them.. And thinks he is the apple of eyes in every one's eyes because of his humorous ways.. sigh..
Lastly, i met a guy some time back for matrimonial purposes.. He was the real a**hole.. He wants wife, someone who cooks for him throughout his life, who should be ready to leave her job when he thinks he is earning enough. When i obviously didnt meet his "requirements", He said NO (( thankfully )) along with a whole lot of derogatory words for me.. He projected me as a loose character in front of my parents.. It was a BOMB which rocked my home for a long while and still does in some way or the other..

But for good, i know many wonderful men in my life.. and am glad for having them :)

Life, as it turns out to be..

How difficult it is to let go of things, which are very dear to you, and yet you know are harming you in some way or the other..

How difficult it is to believe that image you have in your mind is not what reality is..

How dificult it is to make someone, you love, believe in what you are doing; when they clearly dont agree to what you want to do..

How difficult it is to be standing in front of brutal truth, when all this while you assumed nonchalantly about the beauty of everything nice going in your life..

I know it is very difficult.. do you?

Birthday Wishes.. :)

Well, me bday is just round the corner, and i was just wondering what to write in new post for mah blog.. So I am telling you all what i wish to get on my budday :)

1. A wall clock.. My last wall clock just vanished after my room got a makeover. I find it so dissapointed to look at my empty wall, when i wake up in the morning. With eyes half open and my brain half asleep, I just forget there's no clock for now. That is my first and the most impotan wish for this birthday.. I have ventured out 3 times to look for a very nice clock.. but i still have not found the right kind. :(

2. A digital thermometer.. Just Like that..

3. some beautiful pin-up posters with a nice thought thrown in for that added attraction.. i want them to stick them on my cubicle-walls in office.. I'll probably make two or three.. :) And i am also going to make a penstand.. i have an idea in mah mind and i might make it over this weekend..

4. Peace at home.. there's a cold war going on between me and mah parents.. i would like to end that even when i know its a far-fetched wish..

5. Flowers.. Somehow people always tend to give roses on bdays.. And i always wished someone would give me something different this time.. like some wild flowers.. i love small flowers, the tiny ones bunched up together :)

6. Some new clothes, some new sandals, some new earrings and some new lipsticks.. i will be going to a shopping trip next weekend, after i get my first stipend.. :)

7. eye lenses.. I am tired of wearing specs( even though i dun wear them often enuff :D).. any suggestions on what type/kind/color/brand to choose from?

8. A book whose name i have forgotten right now :D i'll check it up and then buy it.. A pulp-fiction novel wont be too bad either..

Somethings i'll buy for my self.. somethings i'll make for myself.. somethings i'll hope to get as presents.. and somethings i know i am not going to get..

So thats about it for now.. i might add/delete somethings to this, since i still have 2 weeks to change my mind over something.. and if you want to gift me something you are always always welcome :D

Where's the need?

Recently i have started to have very strong feel to change people's perception about me. I feel it is so odd that people comment on my physique in a negative way. I know i am on the heavier side but i am as fit as anyone could be. I cannot change my appearance drastically because i cannot lose weight easily, but still i chose to accept the way it is and be happy.
I feel so repulsive when people cant believe i can jog for 4-5 kms.. or my body is more flexible than theirs cos i have been working out since some time now.. I was having a discussion with a colleague in office about going to some place which is 3 kms away and he said "Have you ever walked that much in your life at one go?" I felt bad at that.. i mean i can jog upto that place in 15-20 minutes and he says have u even walked that much..
I Love to eat fruits, i love the freshness.. now recently i was having fruits in lunch.. not just one fruit, but half a dozen types.. I am having this lunch for some time now and i have experienced, not just its healthy and fulfilling but also keeps me energetic for the whole day.. BUT people reacted in a way i never even thought about - "Are you dieting?".. lolz.. fruits too have calories, they are natural sources of sugar.. and they fill our stomach too :)
When these people comment, it is still OK, cos they dont really know me.. but when my mom says the same thing i get so amused.. I know she wanted a very beautiful daughter ( i know i am.. :D ) and ever since i remember she thinks if i get slimmer i will get more beautiful.. If I am happy being the way i am, why stress out mentally about the way my body is built? I excesrcise regularly, do pranayam regularly, and see myself fit to fight the battle of life.. Then why do people still think i need to be better?

Twists and turns..

well, no twists and turns happening in my life right now.. life is very boring.. i wish writin this could bring some change :D I have started going to office and i am finding the days very very very veryyyyyyyyy long.. boo hoo hoo.. :( pata nahi yaar tum log pura din kaise nikalte ho office me.. kaam dhaam bhi jyada nahi mila hai abhi tak to..


vaise yaha pe internet access nahi allowed hai mereko.. i am accessing this with some one else's account.. and if i really get so much time throughout my internship, i might get back to blogging.
Also, i have started missing those old days when i would surf so many blogs and share my thoughts with the world.. :)